Request #6 for ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
cyndisuesue
Aug. 12th, 2007 12:38 amficsbydeenasRequested by CyndiSueSue
I'm sure I'm too late for a whole drabble request, but I would like to run an idea by you for a humorous drabble anyway. No one has written anything about how for a small while Hermione was a "boy" -well, she certainly had a few new things to process, didn't she, before the action began?! At least I haven't seen this ficlet play out yet if it was written. Seems like a funny H/R bit could arise out of this, no? Maybe even a funny Hermione /Ginny exchange?
I couldn't resist this one! I hope you like it!
Hermione Granger was drunk. It was only the third time she'd ever been this drunk in her entire life and she was sure to get drunker.
One thing that she forgot, as did Ginny Weasley, bride-to-be of Harry Potter, was that when Hermione was drunk, she talked. About embarrassing things she would normally NEVER talk about.
It was Ginny's Hen Party, three weeks before the blessed event that Ginny had dreamed about since she was ten, and Ginny, Hermione and several other former Gryffindor ladies were gathered at twelve Grimmauld Place. Harry had done extensive renovations on the property and it was now a cozy and warm place for the two of them to live. Natalie McDonald was in charge of beverages and she brought along a wide variety of Muggle and wizard drinks: Butterbeer, oak-matured mead from the Three Broomsticks (checked for poison and cleared), Ogden's Black Label Firewhisky, Guinness Stout, Newcastle Brown Ale, Bacardi Gold rum, Zyr vodka, Tanqueray gin and a wide variety of white and red wines. Hermione was shocked at all that Natalie had procured, implying that the younger witch knew entirely too much about alcohol, until Hermione had learned that Natalie's uncle ran a pub in Manchester.
Once the "older ladies," namely Ginny's mother, Hermione's mother and Andromeda Tonks, had vacated the party, things really got interesting.
Lavender Brown, fiancée of Viktor Krum, suggested a game of Truth or Dare as entertainment and that is what brought about Hermione Granger's loose lips.
"Okay, Hermione, truth or dare?" asked Morag McDougal.
Hermione stood up, wavered a moment, and finished her fourth tonic and gin. "Truth." She received a groan from the crowd and raised a hand. "I only 'Dare' when Ron is around because I'll do anything to sit on his huge cock."
Ginny's eyes widened and she spat out her mouthful of Riesling.
"Are you okay, Hermione?" asked Luna Thomas, who was drinking only lemonade due to being twenty-three weeks pregnant.
"Never better, Loony," she slurred. "Fire away, Mory!"
Morag stifled a giggle and asked, "So have you ever had sexual fantasies about Harry?"
Ginny groaned and hung her head, her entire body shaking in laughter.
"I don't have to fantasize. I've touched his massive cock. Ginny's one lucky witch!" Hermione poured herself another drink and took a few sips while a throng of gasps filled the room.
"WHAT?" screamed Ginny, her laughter having died.
"OH don't worry, Gin…hehe, I'm drinking you!" Hermione giggled and staggered back over to the chair she'd vacated. "Remember, I was Harry for a while!"
Hermione looked to the group, noticing several looks of incomprehension.
"We were getting Harry out and six of us drank Polyjuice. Harry tasted very good, a bit like rum and Coke, I'd say."
Ginny stood up and walked over to her friend. "Hermione, come on, I think you've said enough—"
"NO! I've held this secret long enough!" she screeched. "I touched his penis, Ginny, I'm sorry!" She collapsed into Ginny's arms, half-sobbing, half-laughing. "I couldn't sit right on that Thestral…I had to move it over…and, damn, it felt so nice, so soft, like velvet. Ginny! He's circumcised! Did you know that?"
'Er, yes, Hermione. I know," Ginny replied softly. "Now let's get you back to the chair…"
"NO! The tip is just…so delicate and velvety…and then it grew and I kept touching it! It's MASSIVE, Ginny! Does he rip you in half when you fuck?" Hermione's eyes were wide open, as if she had asked a teacher for the answer on a test question.
"Herm—"
"Oh I bet he just makes you SCREAM! That cock is so thick, too, like a massive sausage!"
Ginny looked round the room, trying to get her friends to help her out, but they were all too dumb-struck to interrupt Hermione's revelation.
"He does a fair job—"
"FAIR? Ginny I'd be willing to bet a thousand Galleons that he makes you come every time…Ron, on the other hand can be very selfish! Sometimes, he's only in there for three seconds and boom! that's it…Didn't you teach him anything, Lavender?"
It was Lavender's turn to blush and receive a roomful of stares.
"Hermione, we..we only…That's not my fault!" she huffed.
"Oh, I suppose you really couldn't help that you shrieked like a banshee, you were so tight," Hermione stated matter-of-factly. "Speaking of screaming, Ginny—"
"That's enough, Hermione, I think you've given us enough truth for the night," Ginny said through gritted teeth.
"No, this has nothing to do with Harry's penis, really. I just wanted to remind you to cast a Silencing Charm if you decide to have sex at The Burrow again. Ron was a might distracted when he was trying fuck me up the ass—"
Hermione passed out.
Or perhaps Ginny struck her with a non-verbal Pertificus Totalus…
The world may never know.
I'm sure I'm too late for a whole drabble request, but I would like to run an idea by you for a humorous drabble anyway. No one has written anything about how for a small while Hermione was a "boy" -well, she certainly had a few new things to process, didn't she, before the action began?! At least I haven't seen this ficlet play out yet if it was written. Seems like a funny H/R bit could arise out of this, no? Maybe even a funny Hermione /Ginny exchange?
I couldn't resist this one! I hope you like it!
Hermione Granger was drunk. It was only the third time she'd ever been this drunk in her entire life and she was sure to get drunker.
One thing that she forgot, as did Ginny Weasley, bride-to-be of Harry Potter, was that when Hermione was drunk, she talked. About embarrassing things she would normally NEVER talk about.
It was Ginny's Hen Party, three weeks before the blessed event that Ginny had dreamed about since she was ten, and Ginny, Hermione and several other former Gryffindor ladies were gathered at twelve Grimmauld Place. Harry had done extensive renovations on the property and it was now a cozy and warm place for the two of them to live. Natalie McDonald was in charge of beverages and she brought along a wide variety of Muggle and wizard drinks: Butterbeer, oak-matured mead from the Three Broomsticks (checked for poison and cleared), Ogden's Black Label Firewhisky, Guinness Stout, Newcastle Brown Ale, Bacardi Gold rum, Zyr vodka, Tanqueray gin and a wide variety of white and red wines. Hermione was shocked at all that Natalie had procured, implying that the younger witch knew entirely too much about alcohol, until Hermione had learned that Natalie's uncle ran a pub in Manchester.
Once the "older ladies," namely Ginny's mother, Hermione's mother and Andromeda Tonks, had vacated the party, things really got interesting.
Lavender Brown, fiancée of Viktor Krum, suggested a game of Truth or Dare as entertainment and that is what brought about Hermione Granger's loose lips.
"Okay, Hermione, truth or dare?" asked Morag McDougal.
Hermione stood up, wavered a moment, and finished her fourth tonic and gin. "Truth." She received a groan from the crowd and raised a hand. "I only 'Dare' when Ron is around because I'll do anything to sit on his huge cock."
Ginny's eyes widened and she spat out her mouthful of Riesling.
"Are you okay, Hermione?" asked Luna Thomas, who was drinking only lemonade due to being twenty-three weeks pregnant.
"Never better, Loony," she slurred. "Fire away, Mory!"
Morag stifled a giggle and asked, "So have you ever had sexual fantasies about Harry?"
Ginny groaned and hung her head, her entire body shaking in laughter.
"I don't have to fantasize. I've touched his massive cock. Ginny's one lucky witch!" Hermione poured herself another drink and took a few sips while a throng of gasps filled the room.
"WHAT?" screamed Ginny, her laughter having died.
"OH don't worry, Gin…hehe, I'm drinking you!" Hermione giggled and staggered back over to the chair she'd vacated. "Remember, I was Harry for a while!"
Hermione looked to the group, noticing several looks of incomprehension.
"We were getting Harry out and six of us drank Polyjuice. Harry tasted very good, a bit like rum and Coke, I'd say."
Ginny stood up and walked over to her friend. "Hermione, come on, I think you've said enough—"
"NO! I've held this secret long enough!" she screeched. "I touched his penis, Ginny, I'm sorry!" She collapsed into Ginny's arms, half-sobbing, half-laughing. "I couldn't sit right on that Thestral…I had to move it over…and, damn, it felt so nice, so soft, like velvet. Ginny! He's circumcised! Did you know that?"
'Er, yes, Hermione. I know," Ginny replied softly. "Now let's get you back to the chair…"
"NO! The tip is just…so delicate and velvety…and then it grew and I kept touching it! It's MASSIVE, Ginny! Does he rip you in half when you fuck?" Hermione's eyes were wide open, as if she had asked a teacher for the answer on a test question.
"Herm—"
"Oh I bet he just makes you SCREAM! That cock is so thick, too, like a massive sausage!"
Ginny looked round the room, trying to get her friends to help her out, but they were all too dumb-struck to interrupt Hermione's revelation.
"He does a fair job—"
"FAIR? Ginny I'd be willing to bet a thousand Galleons that he makes you come every time…Ron, on the other hand can be very selfish! Sometimes, he's only in there for three seconds and boom! that's it…Didn't you teach him anything, Lavender?"
It was Lavender's turn to blush and receive a roomful of stares.
"Hermione, we..we only…That's not my fault!" she huffed.
"Oh, I suppose you really couldn't help that you shrieked like a banshee, you were so tight," Hermione stated matter-of-factly. "Speaking of screaming, Ginny—"
"That's enough, Hermione, I think you've given us enough truth for the night," Ginny said through gritted teeth.
"No, this has nothing to do with Harry's penis, really. I just wanted to remind you to cast a Silencing Charm if you decide to have sex at The Burrow again. Ron was a might distracted when he was trying fuck me up the ass—"
Hermione passed out.
Or perhaps Ginny struck her with a non-verbal Pertificus Totalus…
The world may never know.
